A woman says a promise to repay turned into a dispute after her boyfriend denied agreeing to have groceries and shared bills added to a $12,000 debt. She wrote on Reddit’s r/AITAH that he told her “it was important” and that he paid him back over two years with food and monthly expenses – but he later insisted “none of that mattered”.
The conflict escalated after Thanksgiving, she wrote, when he canceled her discounted car insurance during a new row over the same debt.
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According to the original poster, she fell behind on her rent during the coronavirus pandemic, and her boyfriend paid the $12,000 she owed. He offered to pay for groceries because he made so much more money, but after he told her that paying for groceries would go toward debt, she took on the cost.
She wrote that he never corrected the agreement and watched her abide by it while she shouldered most of the shared expenses.
What does she believe count?
The OP writes that she pays 80% to 90% of their grocery bills, which averages about $800 a month. She also pays for monthly activities they do together, which range from $400 to $800.
By her calculations, her donations totaled between $28,800 and $38,400 over two years. She wrote that she managed the expenses while believing she followed his approved repayment schedule.
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How the dispute affected their relationship
According to the OP, he refused to celebrate holidays and birthdays with her, saying she still owed him money. She added that conversations about repayment often spark conflict, causing her to avoid broaching the topic.
“I’m confident things will level out and we’ll find a way to make things more balanced,” the OP wrote. “Or as people assume, I’m a complete idiot.”
Comment topic reactions
Many comments have been made in response to the OP’s situation, many of which focus on how the repayment was handled and whether she has a payment record. One Reddit user wrote: “This is not a jerk loophole – backdating and invoicing him for his share of groceries and dates. Tell him he needs to pay his fair share in cash due to a misunderstanding.”
Another commenter wrote: “She should look at her receipts or card statements, but I don’t think the OP is that financially savvy. She should have known when she was getting close to the amount she owed on the mental table.”
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This article ‘It’s a big deal,’ her boyfriend says, but after she pays a whopping $38,400 on $12,000 debt, he denies ever saying it, now says ‘it doesn’t count’ originally appeared on Benzinga.com
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