Samuel, who is from Austin, Texas, called “The Ramsey Show” with a question that quickly raised concerns among the hosts george carmel and Jed Warshaw: Is it morally okay to ask his wife to use her personal savings to pay off his car loan?
He explained that he purchased the car two years ago in April after he lost his means of transportation in a car accident. Then, he got married the next month. “That’s convenient,” Carmel said dryly.
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Finance is not fully consolidated
Although Samuel says their finances are combined, it’s not that simple. He and his wife pay the bills together, but she has a separate savings account with about $16,000 to $17,000 in savings she’s been accumulating since she was a teenager. On the other hand, he has no savings and still owes $20,000 on the car.
“You told me your money was consolidated, but then you told me ‘Should my wife use her savings to pay this off?’ So, that tells me it wasn’t consolidated,” Warshaw said.
Samuel said the car is now worth only $7,000 to $9,000. He admitted it was a bad financial move and he made a “stupid decision” in purchasing it. He originally paid $20,000 for the 2013 Cadillac and put $4,000 down.
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Warshaw noted that his wife may have kept the money separate out of fear rather than selfishness. “She was in a just-in-case scenario,” she said, noting that it suggested deeper trust issues. “She said, ‘I want to make sure I have a parachute here in case I pull the joystick.'”
Carmel said the real question isn’t the morality of requiring her to pay off the loan. “That’s the conversation we need to have to put together funding,” he said. Otherwise, he warned, it would just become another “check box” on her resentment scorecard because he never changed his habits.
Samuel added that his wife said she would “100 percent” help, but only if she didn’t feel the need to keep the money as a safety net for emergencies, especially since they have a daughter.
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Kamal demands that Samuel take real responsibility. “Now, you’re using her as a bank to bail you out. A wife’s bank. Guess what? She’s not your mother. She doesn’t want to be your mother. She married you to have a partner.”
They urged him to sell the car, admit his past mistakes and approach his wife with humility. “Hey, baby, I really screwed up,” Carmel advised him. “I’m not the person you need in this marriage. I’m ready for a change.”
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This article’s caller, Dave Ramsey, wants his wife to use her savings to pay off a car he bought a month before the wedding. “It’s Convenient” originally appeared on Benzinga.com
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